Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Eminem Just Doesn't Get It



Having apparently spent his fortune on whores, drugs and subprime real estate, Eminem got back together with Dr. Dre to bang out a beat that sounds like Dresdon Dolls if they actually were German sex dolls being fucked by Nazi scientists, threw together a few of what can only charitably be called rhymes and aimed the track directly between the eyes of the EASIEST POSSIBLE TARGETS.

Bret Michaels! Samantha Ronson & Lindsay Lohan! Kim Kardashian! Sarah Palin! John Mayer!

Thank god Eminem is back to expose society's sacred cows for the ridiculous charlatans they are! Like the part where he demonstrates how hideous Amy Winehouse is -- I'D NEVER HAVE KNOWN!

There are also some allusions to films like "Rain Man" and "Transformers" and "Jailhouse Rock" and "Fargo" -- FOR NO REASON.

But there is one funny Star Trek joke in here.

9 comments:

Phil said...

So you're saying you like the song, right?

Jon said...

Where's the Trek joke in here, because holy fuck am I not watching the entire thing. Andy, I salute you for suffering through it.

andy khouri said...

There's a part near the end where "Spock" strolls by "Sulu" and just casually nerve-pinches him and moves on, causing the ship to spin out of control.

Sam Humphries said...

This is a pandering disgrace.

Supposedly Dre's album was to come out later this year, after 50 Cent and Eminem's albums laid the groundwork. 50's album came and went, and this is not looking pretty either. Damn.

N.M.C. said...

Hey, he watches TV. He's an EVERYMAN, right?

N.M.C. said...

What does Ellen Degeneres have that I don't? How about a vagina?

Josh Xing said...

I didn't know Perez Hilton could rap.

laurennmcc said...

I agree with everything y'all said, including that the Star Trek jokes were funny. I wish that THAT was the video. With another song. About Star Trek.

Oh, evidently, the Rain Man stuff was in reference to how everyone says that the only reason Eminem is successful is because of Dre. Who looks really fucking old, btw. Much like Eminem's targets and beats.

Sam Humphries said...

I thought the RAIN MAN scenes were about Dr. Dre being gay like Tom Cruise.